Okay, so I'm /actually/ about to write a porn fic to AO3, and I'm interested in knowing what the difference is between the M rating and E rating. Able to enlighten me?
Mature is 'and then they made love.' Explicit is 'and here's how they did it exactly.'
To wit: mature.
He looked at the envelope, spread out before him.
God, he'd never been this hungry.
Could he be gentle enough? Slow enough? He didn't want to damage it, didn't want to do anything he'd regret... but no, no, it seemed the envelope wanted this as much as he did. It slipped into his hands, it folded as he asked. When it was time for more, the card was waiting, and he somehow knew exactly what to do. He moved with his correspondence in a dance as old as the mail system, and when it was over, he was smiling and the envelope was completely, thoroughly sealed.
Explicit:
The envelope waved its flap in the air slowly, gently, and he could see the faint shimmer of the adhesive traced along its fold. It was like a taunt, a dare: won't you? And he would, oh, God, he would, lifting the envelope firmly to his lips, licking slowly at first, then faster, more firmly, tasting the envelope's essence, the faint bitterness, the sweetness to follow--
Oh, he couldn't help but smile at how it felt in his hands. It was so perfectly folded. Its paper was rough against his fingers, and its crossed folds shifted slightly as it opened for his eager tongue. Yes, yes...
Now the card, and his hand trembled as he lifted it, as he held the envelope, stretching it wide. Would it fit? Oh... oh, yes, it would fit, it slid in smooth and quick and filled the envelope to bursting, oh, made for each other, and he smiled in delight at how perfect it was.
He was ready. Now, now, now: with one swift movement he folded the flap over and he pressed, yes, he pressed the flap down and it stuck, God, it stuck perfectly, and he closed his eyes in bliss.
Afterwards, he stroked the envelope, and thought about addresses.
i mean, its a good explanation, but oh my god
LOL
And now my wedding invitations take on new meaning 🌚
elodie: m/m for mail/man
Seconded, @marithlizard! This is both hilarious and educational.
Roflmao!!
Yes. Please.
okay but who licks the adhesive before they put in the letter. i can't get beyond this.
Oh my days 😁😁😁
Lmao!!
OMG!! This made my day.
Well, I will never look at an envelope the same way. You have amazing skills. Thank you!!
MY NEW OTP
This is fucking weird. Good writing, but weird.
I now have seen all of the porn
@ayamabuki *bursts into laughter* Thank you for showing me that this morning XDDD
The fresh hell is this envelope porn doing on my dash omg tag your pR0n people pls
Ooooooooops
That is fucking hilarious
Could you make manuals for everything else in life?
Omg you found it Yaaaas!
I have to do Christmas cards today and I think I’m gonna need a cigarette after reading that....
IN A DANCE AS OLD AS THE MAIL SYSTEM
“Crikey”- tumblr user angrybirdhat
Aaaaand, there's a new kink.
roflmao!!!
Wow fans self
AGHABLHAALBGEHFFSFGKG
omg lololol this was awesome! amazing writer!!
I LOVE YOUR EXAMPLE a dance as old as the postal system LOL Then I said Oh Shit bc I've been tagging E content as M shit shit shit
Wtf did I just read XD
Every Writer should save this some how. Spot on!
YA novels for teens are more detailed than "they made love." Although when I read YA novels by Victoria Evers I thought it was unusual how detailed it was, with the glaring exception of erections. There was profanity, gore, and sexy stuff, but it never talked about erections.
I’ll never look at an envelope the same way again.
You are awesome!
@lilly-white haha omg that was great!
omg... wow. what did I just read? lol!
how to get horny with an envelope JAJAJAJAJ
why was this so tantalizing and yet so fricking funny
I love you.